Over the last several weeks, our nightly angst has become greater and greater, as we don’t know what to expect the next morning. Tuesday night we were feeling okay as we went to bed, but Wednesday, Holden didn’t wake up until 7:00 pm, and when he did, he was unconsolable for all but maybe an hour.
When he is in this mode, there is nothing that appeases him. Tonight the fries were too short and the ends were too pointy. The orange popsicle wasn’t juicy enough and the green popsicle was too juicy. His oldest sister Ella was banished to her room and I still don’t know what she did wrong this time. Repeatedly he tells us all that he doesn’t love us. This may sound like it stings, and it used to a little bit, but we’ve somehow become accustomed to it, and of course, we know he doesn’t mean it.
Holden did manage a couple of smiles before the night was over. Ella made her second attempt to renter the room, this time successful due to her willingness to take over as the family room jester. She held his attention for a bit and joined in the popsicle party. I treasure those moments as much as my own, particularly because Holden is a little harder on them and I’m not sure his insults roll off them the way they do for Alex and I. Sibling love is a wonderful thing.
Holden was finally zapped again by 10:00 but we had an unusually difficult time getting him relaxed enough to fall asleep tonight. Typically, when he hits that wall, he passes out pretty quickly. Tonight he was fighting it restlessly and the meds we have for this weren’t helping. Alex finally calmed him down around midnight in the rocking chair. No love for me today so I’m once again steeling some while he sleeps, which is my incentive to sleep on the floor.
This nightly angst is in full effect right now but praying for a smile in the morning and hoping I don’t get socked in the mouth for sleeping too close or smelling bad.